8 Helpful Tips If You Are Feeling Homesick
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Our homes–and the people we surround ourselves with–can help create a sense of belonging and comfort. The world can get lonely and a lively, comforting home can help manage loneliness and make you feel that you are a part of a greater collective. However, sometimes we have to leave home in order to grow as people. Whether you’re headed off to college, moving into your own apartment, or going on an extended trip for the first time, feelings of homesickness may arise.
With every change comes excitement and possibility, but also with it can come loneliness and fear; where there’s loneliness and fear, homesickness can grow and flourish. Learning how to take back control when these feelings arise is essential for moving forward and growing.
What Does It Mean To Be Homesick?
Homesickness is the feeling that is brought on by being away from home and in a new environment. It can often feel like an intense longing for one's home or a familiar environment. It most often occurs when you’re away from your usual place of residence, such as when you move to a new city, start college, travel, or live in a different country. Homesickness can manifest as feelings of nostalgia, sadness, or a deep longing for the people, places, routines, and comforts associated with home.
However, it is also important to note that homesickness is a natural and common response to being away from home and doesn't necessarily indicate a problem or weakness. It's a normal part of the adjustment process when experiencing significant life changes or being in unfamiliar environments or situations. That being said, it can be an uncomfortable feeling to work through, often leaving you feeling stuck without helpful resources.
““...homesickness is a natural and common response to being away from home and doesn’t necessarily indicate a problem or weakness. It’s a normal part of the adjustment process when experiencing significant life changes...””
With time, support, and effective coping strategies, homesickness typically diminishes as you become more accustomed to your new surroundings and establish a sense of belonging. These strategies can help you bring those comfortable feelings of home into your new life.
What Does Being Homesick Feel Like?
Homesickness can look different to everyone. While your experience might not exactly mirror what is listed below, many of the following symptoms and feelings are most common:
Feelings of sadness, loneliness, or anxiety
Longing for familiar surroundings, routines, and faces
Preoccupation with thoughts of home
Difficulty adjusting to new surroundings or a new culture
Loss of appetite or changes in sleep patterns
Lack of motivation or decreased enjoyment in activities
Withdrawal from social interactions or a sense of isolation
Physical discomfort that can manifest itself in feelings of anxiety and overall nerves
If you’re experiencing these feelings, you aren’t the first and certainly won’t be the last. Notice what feelings are most overwhelming to you and follow some of these helpful tips to beat homesickness and start your new life (or adventure!) on the right path.
How to Stop Feeling Homesick
When you are homesick, it can feel overwhelming. At times, it can even keep you from moving forward in life or during a new experience, such as traveling. Rather than quickly returning home when these feelings arise, find other methods to cope with them, feel them out, and move on from that stuck, hopeless feeling, to ultimately find calm and peace in the new place that you want to feel like home. Here are a few tips that can help you move forward when you’re feeling the nostalgic pull of homesickness.
Write or Call Home
Just because you’re away from home doesn’t mean you have to cut off all contact from your distant loved ones. Take the time to write a heartfelt letter, call, or Facetime those closest to you. This can help you to stop fixating on what your life was like and instead, focus on what it can become. Get the conversation flowing with your family and friends and soon, that lonely feeling will start to disappear. Your loved ones can also ask about how you’re doing now and take an interest in where you are (or what you are doing). By knowing that you have their encouragement, you can grow in this new space.
Make an Up-Beat Playlist
Music can help distract you from the negative feelings you’re facing and help to put a smile on your face. Make a playlist that’s loaded with songs that make you feel happy. Sometimes, it can be easier to listen to sad songs and sink deeper into your melancholy feelings, but keeping your music upbeat and happy can help you get over this negative feeling much faster. If you don’t know where to begin, look up recommendations for songs that are similar to your favorites, and add them to your playlist.
Incorporate Reminders of Home in Your Space
If you’ve recently moved into a new house, apartment, or dorm, your new space may feel drastically different from your old home. While the feeling might not be the same, it doesn’t have to look like a vastly new space! Incorporate photos of your loved ones and decor from your home into this new space. This simple action can automatically give your new home that warm, welcoming, and familiar feeling that you are seeking.
Cook a Nostalgic Meal
A home-cooked meal can help brighten your spirits, even when you’re not at home. Ask your family for a recipe for one of your favorite meals. Recreate it in your new home and enjoy feeling the nostalgia of your past waft over you. Cooking a meal from when you were a kid can help cue all your senses into fondly remembering home, all while living in a new place.
Create a New Routine
If you’re in a new place but thinking constantly about home, it may be because you don’t have a new routine you’re immersed in at your new place. You might have part of a routine started, with work, classes, and other activities that take place at a set time, but what do you do with the rest of your waking hours? Create structure to your life with a routine that inspires you to take advantage of the present and not dwell on the past.
Start Building a Community
If you’ve recently moved to a new city, you might not yet have a core group of people to hang out with in the area. This can feed into your feelings of loneliness and make settling in even more difficult. Start going to events with like-minded people and begin building your community in the new place that you’re living. While finding friends in a new city can be difficult (especially as an adult!), start by going to community events in your apartment building or around your school. Chat with new people and take the initiative to make plans. Building friendships takes time, but it’s often up to you to take the first step to reach out to the people that you want to get to know better.
Talk to a Professional
Talking to a therapist about what you’re experiencing and getting actionable advice can help you to understand these feelings and also to help you from dwelling on the life that you had back home. Professionals can give you advice without judgment and will be able to offer advice that’s truly unique for your situation. If you’re away at college or university, there are likely free therapy sessions available that are intended to help you navigate through this difficult transition and come out at the other end, stronger than ever. Don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed about reaching out for help.
““Homesickness–and the sadness, anxiety, and other negative feelings associated with it–can be brutal on your mental health.””
Homesickness–and the sadness, anxiety, and other negative feelings associated with it–can be brutal on your mental health. Finding ways to cope and process these feelings can be essential for starting your new chapter in life.
Write in a Journal
Similarly to talking your feelings through with a professional or someone you care about, you can also write those feelings down in a journal. Getting the emotions out of your head and onto a piece of paper can help you to clear your mind. It can also serve as a method to track how your feelings are changing over time. You might look back at journal entries from the past and find that you feel in a much better place now and see that you’ve been able to grow even as you’re feeling homesick and lonely.
Homesickness can be an inevitable situation that you have to consciously work through. However, don’t simply ignore these negative feelings! Creating a new life in the place that you are currently at is about identifying what is causing your homesickness and working with yourself to find ways to address it. With time and care, the feelings of missing home and what you’re used to will start to disappear. Follow these tips to create a space that starts to feel just as good–if not better–than home.