Struggling With Imposter Syndrome? 7 Tips To Overcoming Your Insecurities
You’ve just gotten done presenting a project you’ve been working on for months. You hear a genuine round of applause you cannot believe. But, you take a step back when your boss personally commends your work. You believe that there must be some sort of mistake. There’s no way you deserve this amount of praise. You feel like someone else should be receiving the rewards and you are merely an imposter taking their place. That’s an example of what it's like to live with imposter syndrome.
"Imposter Syndrome" is a term used to describe an intense, recurring feeling of inadequacy. Individuals with high amounts of intelligence, talent, and accolades commonly feel like imposters, undeserving of any rewards. Women, especially women of color, are more susceptible to enduring these feelings and imposter syndrome can hinder a person from reaching their full potential. When someone is plagued by insecurities, it becomes harder to chase those “impossible” dreams and makes overcoming imposter syndrome a battle. However, there are some coping strategies that may help the fight.
7 Tips For Coping With Imposter Syndrome
Understand What Could Be Causing Your Imposter Syndrome
The key to coping with imposter syndrome is understanding why exactly you feel unimportant or not good enough. Psychologists Suzanna Imes and Pauline Rose Clance originally coined the term as “imposter phenomenon,” following their 1978 study that examined high-achieving women. These findings have prompted an innumerable amount of seminars, books, and courses to help alleviate the phenomenon of successful women feeling undeserving.
Imes and Clance (1978) listed causes of this phenomenon, including family upbringing and a patriarchal society. In the decades since the study, a growing number of thinkers have argued whether or not imposter syndrome is an appropriate label.
The first listed cause—your upbringing—is the least disputed. The majority still supports that imposter syndrome occurs commonly as a result of recurrent criticism. This can be criticism from your parents, teachers, or peers. Those raised in environments where excellence is expected and those in careers that require constant critiquing, such as artists, are especially prone to developing imposter syndrome.
However, the second listed cause—a patriarchal society—has brought about numerous debates. While it is true that high achieving women disproportionately feel like imposters in their lives, it’s important to look to the root of those feelings. Women are indeed subjected to living in a white, male-driven society. This means that most careers—and the culture at large—were not contrived with women positively considered.
As a consequence, women are frequently made to compare themselves to a male-driven image that, for many, is impossible to mirror. Add to that, women of color are even more likely to forcefully compete with these images and ideals that support racism and xenophobia, to name a few. That is why an increasingly growing group believes that “imposter syndrome” is a poor label. Women are not imposters. They are simply navigating a world that was not made for them.
““That is why an increasingly growing group believes that ‘imposter syndrome’ is a poor label. Women are not imposters. They are simply navigating a world that was not made for them. ””
Recognize Those Imposing Thoughts
While imposter syndrome starts with outside influences, it is also deeply internalized. It’s easy to find ourselves repeating thoughts of self-deprecation. These could be intrusive thoughts you were not prepared for or subconscious beliefs you don’t even realize you have. These thoughts could sound like, “I know I’ll lose because everyone is more talented than me” or “I don’t understand why they hired me when there are people who are more qualified for the job.”
There are many forms of negative thoughts that result from and perpetuate imposter syndrome. Make a point to be mindful of the words you whisper to yourself. A major step in being able to overcome imposter syndrome is being able to recognize what it looks like within your own mind.
Speak with a Licensed Therapist
Connecting with a therapist can provide you with the opportunity to process your imposter syndrome with a skilled professional. Finding a therapist to trust and process your insecurities with can take some time, and that is okay. Sometimes, the easiest way to connect with a professional is first choosing one of similar age, race, and interests.
Sharing these minimal characteristics with a therapist may breed a safer environment of trust, which is especially needed when discussing how you view yourself. Therapists should not only be empathic, but they are additionally equipped with scientific tools to help others work through deep-rooted feelings, such as imposter syndrome.
Ask For Advice
Therapists aren’t for everyone—and that is okay, too. Many people find them inaccessible, due to financial impact or location, while others just simply aren’t comfortable with the idea of trusting a stranger. Regardless, seeking advice in some form is imperative to coping with imposter syndrome. Speaking with friends or acquaintances regarding your fears may allow you to recognize, process, and work through your feelings better than if you were to do it alone.
You may be surprised at the beneficial feedback you get from others! One of the greatest signs of strength is being able to recognize your own weakness. Be okay with not being perfect and ask for help when needed.
Don’t Compare Yourself. Relate.
Comparing yourself to others will only intensify low self-worth. It’s been said that the act of comparing yourself to someone else is like robbery; you’re stealing your own confidence. Yet, humans naturally look to their right and left to see how the next person is doing. It’s normal to want to compare yourself to a peer. However, it’s more beneficial for your self-worth if you relate instead. Relating allows you to think of someone else as an equal and not as an abstract entity you could never be. It’s possible to admire someone and still relate to them. By talking to or accepting mentorship from a talented leader, you’re embracing an opportunity to discuss the normal characteristics you share with a person you admire. This may, in turn, positively influence how you view yourself and your work.
Write Down Your Accomplishments
Expect mistakes, but do not harp on them. Instead, reframe your mind to focus on your accomplishments, from the little ones to the big ones. Writing down your accomplishments on paper or typing them out can prove to be a beneficial reminder that you are capable, competent, and worthy of praise and accolades. Writing down accomplishments may also act as a planning tool. By seeing what you achieved this month, you may be better able to plan projects moving forward.
However, it’s important to note that there is a difference between feeling proud of your accomplishments and feeling dependent upon them. Those with perfectionist tendencies (who also suffer from imposter syndrome) are especially likely to feel the latter. Depending on accolades can easily take a negative toll on self-worth. Appreciating wins and losses equally will help you accept who you are, regardless of achievements. Write down your wins, but refrain from letting the wins define you (which so often perpetuates the feelings of being an imposter).
Take a Leap of Faith
It would be a lie to claim that there is a guaranteed way to defeat self-doubt indefinitely. That’s why, when we talk about imposter syndrome, it’s important to discuss coping strategies. Taking risks won’t always eliminate your fears of inadequacy. However, they will eliminate your fear of not trying. That’s because you did try. Jumping out on faith is the push that many coping with imposter syndrome need to move forward. Sometimes, that leap of faith will land you in the realization that you do deserve praise.
Not feeling good enough is something most people feel at some point or another in their lives, but imposter syndrome takes that feeling several steps further. Accurately labeled or not, it is a disabling mindset that women and, especially women of color, are prone to experience. For that reason, it’s important to utilize coping strategies to distance from this socially constructed mindset. Overcoming imposter syndrome can be a hard battle, but you deserve to fight for yourself.